I stand by all the misstatements that I've made.

2010-12-23T16:05:00.006+01:00

ILOVEYOU ♥
HAPPY 10MONTHSARY MY LOVE !

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2010-12-19T06:21:00.003+01:00

SICK GIRL SPEAKS

Ive had this very bad flu and it lasted for 3, 4 days and now im feeling slightly better already but guess what?! SORE THROAT AND LOST OF VOICE! But not my standard sore throat where its just scratchy, its more like if i swallow it gives me tremendous pain and instantly travels up the back of my head and thats where the pain stays. Later on, I started coughing. It gotten worst, especially at night when i was about to get my sleep or during in the middle of my sleep. UGHH

I had been drinking loads of water and i dont know why the hell im so sick.
I want to get well soon! :((((

MY STOMACH! SO BIG NOW. HEHEHE

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2010-12-18T14:10:00.005+01:00

COUNTING DOWN TO MY EDD.

Im 6months pregnant! I have had constant backache now for the past few days and also some pain near my ribs and round my belly. the pain gets worse then it dullens but it never goes away no matter what i do. At times the pain became increasingly sharp as if someone was periodically stabbing a small knife into my lower back. Is this normal? Else what can i do to get rid of this pain? Its driving me crazy! I hope i dont have to put up with all this pain till i give birth :((

Shall upload photos of my tummy the next post :)
Stay tunned! :D

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2010-12-17T08:40:00.008+01:00

A LIL CHUNK OF ME

I apologize in advance for the lateness of this entry.
I also apologize for going completely overboard with the pictures!

Yesterday was my dad's in law bday! We first had dinner at Sakura somewhere near their place then we head back home to cut cake. Me and hubby were late for the dinner cause we went to causeway point to get this ice cream cake for his dad.

I TOOK IT WHILE KILLING TIME. JUST ME ONLY :)))

ME AND MY BOY

Will upload the cutting cake photos soon!
My internet connection damn bad right now.

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2010-11-20T14:19:00.003+01:00

NOVEMBER PLEASE BE GOOD FOR ME :)

Will be moving house next week. LIKE FINALLY.
&& im counting down to my EDD.

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2010-10-29T07:57:00.008+02:00

27 OCT 2010

Ever since im pregnant, i dont even have the mood to make up already.
Anw also gain so much weight. Make up or not also look ugly.
So TA DAAA! MY NUDE FACEE! Hehehes.

Went out with my guy since hes not working on that day.
We went to this italian restaurant at liang court for our lunch first then to bugis.

I havent step into bugis for ages already! Its still so hot and crowded over there =_= Got nothing much to buy also. Got myself 2 hairband, a pair of wedges and a tube dress only. Hehehs. And baby got himself a cap. Like so random.

We shopped for ONLY 2 HOURS and we are dead bored already -_= Both of us are like so tired and sleepyyyy. Walked over to illuma to chill. Decided to have desserts at empire state. End up we ordered this huge burger and eat instead. Whahahas.

Though its very sinful but eat it once in awhile still okay and moreover its very delicious.
We did not finish this huge burger in the end. LOLOL

&& thats me with me huge stomach taken by him.

Can someone tell me what is he trying to do? AHAHAHAS.
He made me took a pic of this.

We went home after dinner :))) Oh btw, i went scanning at hospital yesterday and i finally know the gender of the baby! its a baby boy! Hehehes. My hubby was so happy because he always wanted a boyyy.

Hubby cannot take his eyes off our lil son. Hes just too cute to be true.
Hes sleeping so soundly in my womb. Hehehs.

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2010-10-25T12:37:00.006+02:00

IM ON A ROLLERCOASTER RIDE WITH A JUMBLE OF DIFFERENT EMOTIONS EVERYDAY

Im pregnant for 4months already. See stomach all come out already. Many of my clothes cant fit me anymore ))): I feel so pissed whenever im going out and last minute cant find the top that fit me. And the more i tried to find the top to cover my stomach, the more i find it impossible -_- Got to buy more oversized tops already. Tskkk. Im still suffering from morning sickness. Sighh. oh, and the leg cramps, Hate it! Worse of all, i cant wear my heels out! Im so sick of flats already. Had been wearing them for the last 17weeks. Gonna wear my wedges out in future, DONT CARE! At least they are easier to walk and less dangerous? Hehehes.

Im a really fast walker and a bit jumpy. Literally jumping to my feet when i need to get something, stomping my feet when im excited. None of that now! Gentle movements are the way to go and im still trying to get used to it. Wish me luck

Last month scanning photos.

28th OCT im going for another scanning and check up. Lets pray hard by then i can know the gender of my lil one. Heehees. I want a baby girl so badly! so look like me more :))) LOLOLOL

Reasons that im happy because im pregnant. For once i feel good when i gain weight. Whahahas! && ive a great excuse to buy new cute bras! Also i dont have to suffer stomach cramp every month because of my menses. Can sleep till late without anybody disturbing you! Even if im awake, there will be people asking me to rest. Whoohoos. BEST OF ALL, i got loads of attention from my parents, uncles, aunty, friends and not to mention my partner :)))

IM ENJOYING MY LIFE NOW.
GOOD FOOD AND PLENTY OF REST EVERYDAY
THERES NOTHING BETTER THAN THIS ♥

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2010-10-17T17:44:00.007+02:00

JUST ONE GLIMPSE CAN CHANGE A LIFE

Havent been blogging for ages, i know. HAHA! Anw finally my wedding dinner is over. It was a tiring but memorable day! Was dead beat when we step into the hotel room. Im not going to upload all the pictures here. Its all in my facebook. Just upload one or two funny ones will do. hehehe.

Ohya, i have got two rings :))
One is me and my guy couple ring, another one is my wedding ring.

I look like an egg here. Ive gain so much weighht. OMG WHAHAHAHAAHS!
And the best thing is baby is holding the red umbrella when theres shelter. LOL

And i kind of like this picture. Look so old school.

My elder brother and my future sis in law. They are getting married soon. Planning for their big day already (((:

The guys in my family ♥

And lastly, my new family :)

okays! check out the rest of the photos in my Facebook!

Shall end my blog with this cute picture of my guy :)
He make me feel like im a cinderella here. Hees.

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2010-10-02T11:40:00.002+02:00

I LOVED HIM! I KNOW ITS GOING TO BE AN ENJOYABLE AND ENDURABLE JOURNEY

Whoohoos! My bridal shoots photos and album are finally ready. Loved it alot :)))) But im not going to upload all cause theres really alot. Took with 8 different type and colours of growns so you can imagine.

All the blood, sweats and tears, we are finally getting married.

&& right now, im counting down to my big day!!
&& after that we will be getting a house of our own :)))) How excited is this!?

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2010-09-25T13:07:00.005+02:00

A POSITIVE TWIST

Oh, went in malaysia to celebrate my dad's birthday 2 days ago ( 23 sept ) Hahahas! Its also me and baby 7 monthsary that day. Went shopping, billiard and had seafood for dinner. We enjoyed ourselves immensely :)))) Will upload the photos soon!

Being home alone is taking its toll. i mean don't get me wrong i do love the peace and quiet and all but i am discovering that underneath it all i am a people person i need people around me. I often think its great to live alone but im so wrong. && nw everyday im praying for my guy to knock off from work early to accompany me. Hahaha. For some reason i feel like things are changing for the positive. i seem to be happy and contented with who i am for the moment. (considering the struggles of the last few weeks, physically but more so mentally this is a good thing). I've had time to evaluate who i am and have had time to put to one side the things that are not yet critically important to me

i am who i am, i believe what i believe and i love who and what i love, no one but me has the right or the power to try and change that and therefore i will not be swayed so easily into accepting things because other people want me too.

Had flu for no reason suddenly in the morning till now ))):
Alright. i shall go for my dinner now.

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2010-09-25T12:48:00.003+02:00

NOTHING LIKE A NICE HOT CUP OF CHOCOLATE

Well the last couple of days i havent been myself. I look damn bloated because of my pregnancy. i feel fat and ugly!! :(((( Ive been staying at home always and doing housechores. Its unbelievable right?! I dont have the mood to go out and shop anymore. My whole body feel sore after walking even for a short while. Damn annoying. Tskkkk.

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2010-08-31T07:43:00.001+02:00

I FEEL BRIGHT WHEN YOU STAND NEAR

Sleep over at my baby's house :))))

I dont understand myself. I wear my strangeness like armor and rage when people shun me or misunderstand me. I reject the ordinary, the commonplace, the normal, in favor of the weird and unusual. And the world looks at me and i dont know what it sees but it does not see who i am. Im never able to translate the way i see the world into terms most people can get, rarely able to truly communicate. Hand gestures and pidgins for a perspective that, not to be arrogant, I think the world needs right now.

I hate being strange sometimes. When im younger i have my bubble, people and places and situations i enjoy and that im comfortable in, but as i get older i have only the barest scrapings. WHY?

Forget it, im just whinning here.

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2010-08-30T04:39:00.007+02:00

I WILL NOT DIE AN UNLIVED LIFE

I lost it. Like a penny. And over those few days, where i admitted defeat, threw up my hands and walked away, because being alive in a dead world hurts. Feeling when everyone around me had ceased was like keeping a candle lit in a hurricane.

I threw my spirituality away. I dammed it up, paved it over, entombed it. I survived on the memory and spent hours trying to convince myself of things i once knew intuitively were true.

I really wish to know why i am the way i am and get so drained around people, especially toxic and unhealthy people. I need great plans!

PS: Life lesson. The grass is never greener in reality. Never.

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2010-08-27T06:06:00.003+02:00

I SHUT MY EYES AND ALL THE WORLD DROPS DEAD

So many things happened lately and i really dont know where to start. Lets dont talk about the bad stuffs :))) Anw, im getting married! Busy preparing everything for the big day! Took our wedding shoots already and i cant wait for it to be ready! HAHAHA! I thought i look fugly and gross in there because of the thick make up and the photographer kept forcing us to smile. Me and my guy hate smiling when we are taking pictures! BUT when we saw the raw photos that the photographer show us, it wasnt that bad! :)))) We quite like it in fact. They will be editing those photos that we chose and be ready for us to see the final piece on 13SEPT. CANT WAITTTT, OMG!!

OH BTW, im getting married to this guy here! hahaha!

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2010-07-31T07:56:00.005+02:00

IM THE GIRL YOU WILL NEVER BE

It amazes me how tacky people can be sometimes.
Have some class bitches.

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2010-07-27T12:20:00.003+02:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GRANDPARENTS! ♥

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2010-07-25T14:34:00.005+02:00

WHAT WOULD LIFE BE IF WE HAD NO COURAGE TO ATTEMPT ANYTHING?

So last night me and my boy talked about people we knew were doing nowadays. He brought up the subject how so many people in our year were now married with kids and what not and he asked if perhaps maybe one day we could settle down together or something like that... HAAA only kidding. He didnt say that... thought I might put something like that in there just to get you going. But yeah we just named the people that we knew who were hitched and what not and we talked about our parents and talked about how he had always loved his family and also he told me what makes him attracted to me! Hehe! but im not going to tell you this =p Anyway, i always love late night chats with him

My eyes is swollen and puffy lately and i dont know why! URGHH. Annoying shit.

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2010-07-22T18:48:00.003+02:00

23 JULY 2010

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2010-07-20T15:51:00.008+02:00

ONLY WHEN WE NO LONGER AFRAID DO WE BEGIN TO LIVE :))))

There comes a point when something happens that heightens awareness indefinitely. Senses are sharpened. There’s only cautious rest but no complete comfort. In a heartbeat, you are a blood pump away from a phone call that can rip away at insides and silence smoky rooms. Concern is undulating but never ceases. Tension thickens the air. Attempts at humor are hard-pressed and smiles are uneasy.

Inevitability comes upon you like the speed of a train. Slow in the distance in one moment and barreling over you in the next.

The hardest part isn’t collecting the pieces of yourself once it has passed. The hardest part is seeing what it has done to everyone else, the lasting effects of leaving loved ones behind.

Well i enjoyed myself with my boy and mom immensely yesterday! We had desserts at chinatown after we went to the lawyer firm to settle something then we head down to bugis for steamboat! WOOOOHOOOS! i super love steamboat! hahaha! i mean who dont ?! :)))))) We spend 2 sweet long hours eating. My mom left after that.

So me and my dearest boy took a stroll after that and without knowingly, we ended up at suntec city. Amazing right?! HAHA! we did a lil shopping over there and yeahh, EATT! :DDD We had been eating practically the whole day. HOHOHOHO.

Took a picture of my boy eating. So cute :))))))

OH OH OH! && also, we took neoprints together. hehehe.

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2010-07-17T17:24:00.005+02:00

THERE IS NO FCUKING ESCAPE

Im so over this. im so sick of being this for my whole life )))):
I feel different. Im very determined, very determined this time.

Make dinner for my dogs :))))) Hehehe.

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2010-07-15T11:15:00.003+02:00

HE WHO ANGERS YOU CONQUERS YOU

Afew days ago i told my grandma i wanted to eat abacus beads because baby told me he always wanted to try how it taste like and yesterday she went to get the ingredients. I went down to her place together with my mom to help her. HAHAHA! Abacus Beads are made from freshly mashed Yam which is then combined with tapioca flour to form the dough that is cut and rolled into the shape of an abacus bead

After the abacus beads were ready formed and mark with the distinctive nod in the center, it is then moved to the cooking pot or wok in this case to be thoroughly cooked with just simple clean boiling water, and then blenched in cold or running water to give it that springy and chewy texture.

Today my grandma stir fry the abacus beads with fried shrimps, mushrooms, crab meat etc :)))) && brought it over for me!

Btw, its been ages since i went to my grandma's house. See the garden now became neater already. The grass used to be long.

Will eat the abacus beads together with my boy later when hes back home from work. Okays, im going to have to go and do a food shopping today together with my dogs :))) BYE PEEPSS!

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2010-07-13T16:44:00.006+02:00

IM A GREAT BELIEVER IN LUCK AND I FIND THE HARDER I WORK, THE MORE I HAVE OF IT :))))

Im tired of being all angry and depressy. Im not bitching, moaning, or whining. im not feeling sorry for myself. im stating facts, plain and simple.

I am tired.

Tired of the aches and pains that come along with this body. Tired of being less than i could be. im tired of my body betraying me. im tired of betraying my body. its the only one i have, i should take care of it the best care i can right?! i should fuel it properly and strengthen it, better it! :))) im trying. God knows, im fcuking trying. So why cant it just work with me? Sighhh :((( This is not a setback. i will persist because going back is not an option. i will keep going because that is the only way to achieve my desire. But before i do that, im going to let myself cry a little bit because im human and sometimes we are weak. And because sometimes we need the release.

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2010-07-12T08:32:00.009+02:00

THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY TO BE HONEST WITHOUT BEING BRUTAL.

As i get more interested in photography, i find myself wanting to improve to understand the way the camera works, all the different settings and techniques. not only to learn more advanced techniques, but to learn better composition, to learn everything there is to know about photography. are u the same like me? :))))

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2010-07-09T15:44:00.004+02:00

WHISPERING OF THE WIND

I feel like no one would understand despite my telling people about the depression and calamity inside me. Like its a waste of breath to talk or type it all out. Even if i did then people wouldnt like me anymore because no one wants someone who is weak and emo, then i feel guilty for bending your time for my own stupid problems-

Ultimately i feel like i am not worth the effort, from you, from myself and definitely not from my family/friends. Everyone has other shit to get on with in their lives.

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2010-07-08T14:30:00.014+02:00

BEAUTIFUL INSANITY

I always had the same dream. This dream scared me.I know people will say 'it's just a dream'. But I'm 20 I know my dreaming a patterns, I know what my nightmares are like when I have them. This one was different. This one seemed so real it felt like a memory. What does it mean?

I broke up with my besties. Well i finally got tired of her lies and betrayal. She was suspecting and hinting me how I had "betrayed her" by listening to nonsense people and other junk like that.

Well you see she has been talking about me behind my back, under minding my intelligence to my face (one of my pet peeves), lying right to my face, ignoring me without knowing the truth, and obviously not caring how i feel. .Both story lines were taking a toll on both of us and we didn't talk to each other now. So as you can see she was not the best of friends :))) HAHA! Joke.

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2010-07-07T16:11:00.011+02:00

Change my hairstyle abit. Do you think it suit me? hhmms.

We took alot of pictures that day and if you were to ask me to upload all, it is really crazy but i did tried to stitch all the photos up AND AND AND my laptop hang and boooo, its gone! Fcuking annoyed. NO WAY am i going to do it again. Will upload ALL to facebook when im free :))))))))

Heres some of the pictures of me and him that i like. HAHAAHS

Me and my boy are planning a trip overseas soon and im feeling so excited! HEHEHE! Got to settle everything first, my school projects his work etc. Looking forward to it and seriously a vacation sounds great for us! :))))))

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2010-07-04T08:11:00.011+02:00

PAINT ME WHITE!
My eyes damn swollen and puffy when i woke up yesterday :(((( I guess its because i did not take out my contact lens when im sleeping. Sighh. I know its bad to sleep just like this but i always forget to take out.

Look at my puffy eyes. SOBS.

Wore my younger brother's oversize hoodie out to expo with my mom. Heehee.
We went to get new bedsheet for her room and also visit my boy at work :)))))

&& we took this before sleep. HEHE.

My camera flashlight is so bright that it could kill someone. HAHAHAHA!

i had a nasty nightmare the other night. i was being provoked by my bro's friend i think. then i got really angry and flipped, screaming and kicking. in the dream I could see the image of me punching his face hard. the panic as it rised was overwhelming... incredibly physical and my baby woke me up immediately asking me if im okay because i hit him while hes sleeping and his mouth were bleeding. scared the crapping fuck out of me. it was so real.

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2010-06-30T18:27:00.002+02:00

SUCK IT UP, PRINCESS

I really feel i have excelled myself just a little. I really hope people appreciate that and see that im doing so much. Recently I've felt like im doing so much, yet not getting noticed for it. Its a right shit feeling. I hope that changes. Its so nice just to get a pat on the back and a 'well done girl, you did well today'

So many things happened lately and i dont know where to start. Hmms. Anw me and baby are still great and it just goes to show you can sort things outt even when they go major badd. He got me a new camera today! ♥ Super love it! Shall give my old one to my brother. Heehee!

Pictures taken with my new camera! HAHA! look at our funny joke face.
JUST FOR LAUGH :)))

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2010-06-27T16:24:00.005+02:00

SO MUCH TO DO, SO LITTLE TIME

Went to this boxing competition in the noon. Hhmms, it was my first time watching boxing LIVE and im feeling kind of excited. My brother's friend was one of the fighter there. He did well and won his opponent easily. Ohh, i even took videos of it! hahahs. will upload some other day. Me and my brother left that place early because i wanna go to the robinson sales at expo. heehees! Cabbed down there, got the stuffs we wanted and left.

My baby drive me down to hougang for our late supper. Had a filling meal. Wooos!

The butter fish i ordered was really nice

Anyway, that was today :))))))

Everything that goes wrong lately just shatters me, cause its just another thing i have failed at. I just feel like giving up sometimes, it seems like everyone else is awesome at everything and I suck so bad.

Stick a fork in me, I'm done.

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2010-06-26T17:40:00.009+02:00

BLINDED BY THE SILENCE OF A THOUSAND BROKEN HEARTS

My brother came back from airport today! teeheehees! Went to the airport with my mom to pick him up. We waited for an hour because his plane were late. Tskkk. Glad he enjoyed himself over there.

Btw he got me this couple towel for me and my boy.

Things between me and my boy are beginning to get better. Im feeling happier when I wake up in the morning and to see a smile on his face. I am nowhere near completely better but I am getting there slowly but surely. Heehees! Ohyeah, im going to surround myself with good friends I can trust and think positively. And try to forget about all the bad memories and focus on the good and my future.

Btw I've found that I want to sleep all the time, HAHA! nothing wrong with that I suppose but definately need to get out of the habit of afternoon naps.

I hope everyone is good. Nights.

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2010-06-26T06:42:00.011+02:00

25 JUNE 2010
IGNORANCE IS YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND.

Had a huge quarrel with baby over minor things :(( HATE IT! We sort things out after we both calm down. Hes working at expo and so i accompanied him. I got extremely bored after awhile and decided to walk around the expo alone. OHYEH, i went to the Robinson sales fair also! HAHAHA! Got myself some lingeries and stuffs. Shopping alone is seriously the most pathetic thing ever! so i shopped for like 10mins or so only. Btw, i was at the expo with him for 8hrs. Sitting down there like a pure loser but i dont wanna leave. Seeing how tiring baby job is, makes me sad :((((( I tried to help him out as much as i could so he can finish fast.

LOOK AT OUR TIRED FACE. MY EYES IS LIKE HALF CLOSE.

Cabbed down to cineleisure for our late dinner and movie! Had our dinner at chicago's steakhouse. The food there wasnt really as good as i expected. So normal only.

Okays. thats what we ordered.

Took neoprints together also!

After that then we went for our movie, the karate kid! Well, the show is awesome! Go catch it if you haven watch. I will rate it 4/5. Hehehe!

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2010-06-23T12:20:00.004+02:00

WE COMPROMISE OUR HEARTS TO KEEP THEM SATISFIED.

HAPPY 4MONTHSARY TO ME AND MY BOY.

Today marks our 4th monthsary. Another month gone by and our love are still standing strong. Relationships are always about trust and obviously i trusted him and gave him my heart. Although 4months is not very long but he had proven me that he really do love and care for me and vice versa. Im pretty sure youre the only one i would ever want to share my life with for all eternity. ILOVEYOUBABY ♥

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2010-06-21T17:59:00.003+02:00

In life, i feel that the harder i push myself, the more likely im going to make it, but yet, at the same time, it also makes it more likely that i will fail. sometimes trying too hard, just fucks things up but before i reach my goal, how am i suppose to know if this one thing is the fail or the success? how do i know when to push myself harder, or when to lay down and let the answer drift to me lazily. Sigh, Its just not fair, i just cant beat it. the system will always do me over.

YUPPS, i do not have any regrets, i know what i did, is what i thought was right, and that i made that decision, and im proud of that :))))) The fact that ive the ability to do something for myself, stand up for myself and even if im in the wrong, at the end of the day, at least i can say "hey, at least i fucking tried, at least i fought for what i wanted, at least i did what i thought was best." No one can take that away from me, nor have a go at me! Even if i make a mistake, i know ive made it, and that i learn. at least i tried and failed.

Anw, what im trying to say is it is better to have tried and failed, then to just give the fuck up at the first sign of sorrow or things being too hard.

The guy who loves to tease me! ♥

Hes the guy who give me everything. He treat me like a princess. He give me all his time. he buy me things, take me places, talk for hours with me, take walks with me, lay with me, be with me, take interest in my hobbies and show me his. Constantly telling me that i meant the whole world to him and would love me wholeheartedly.

&& i love him too ♥

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2010-06-20T22:05:00.004+02:00

Well, today was a wonderful day! i spend time with my mom and dad at the same day! Hehehe! I went vivo to shop with my mom this afternoon. We ate loads of delicious food! :)))) Im fcuking bloated already but the food look so tempting that i cant stop myself from eating. YES, greedy you can say. HAHAHAHA!

i took this at the vivo toilet. So damn filthy. Gosh.

Around 6pm, my elder brother text me and told me to meet him at tampines mall and so mummy send me there before she head back home. My brother and i went to get my eyelashes! So mad chio, i swear! look so natural. Im gonna get more when i pass by that shop again.

Soon its 7pm, i went home alone to change while my brother went to meet his friend, datou and company. I went back home.....ZZZ. uhya gonna skip all this boring part. i feel boring reading it myself.

.
.
.
.
.
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Okays so met up with my lovely dad together with my boy, my bro, connie and kelly, we went to eat again! Seriously my stomach going explode any moment. im supposed to be on diet yet i ate so much! Utterly disappointed. Sigh.

ME AND MY RANDOM PICTURES! hahahaha!

Happy Father's Day to all dadddy!

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2010-06-18T11:58:00.002+02:00

I feel smothered. By nothing. Is that even possible? Everything’s just piling up on top of me and I cant see the way out. I know if I work hard then its going to be worth it but… How do I get there? Everything is so far away. Everything is so broken.

HAHAHA! Nice anot my blackberry?!
Change the housing casing to bright pink that i got from online

CREDITS TO BABY FOR HELPING ME TO CHANGE.

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2010-06-18T10:14:00.004+02:00

Met up with my girls yesterday together with joe and his company.

Had dinner at swensens with gloria while waiting for rosanne and joe. After rosanne came down shortly, baby told me to wait at the cineleisure 7-11 there to wait for his friend to pass me his stuffs. Me and my girlfriends waited despite drizzling. And guess what!? Baby came down and look for me to give me a surprise! So sweet right?! AHAHAHAHS!.

Accompanied baby for dinner at koboyashi! :))) HEHEHEHE! Then went kbox to sing. Frankly speaking, i did not enjoy myself that much. baby was mad at me because of my dressing. He dislike me wearing till so revealing. I totally understand hows hes feeling and apologized but he was still burning hot till we got home. Sigh.

Because me and my boy are not on talking terms on the way. I only got to take picture with my darling. I took with my boy too but he was showing a black face......so forget about uploading )))))))))):

We talked things out before bed and im glad we're fine now.

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2010-06-16T13:32:00.003+02:00

CUTE PICTURES OF MY KIDS!
They never fail to lend me their listening ears.

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2010-06-14T06:52:00.008+02:00

(swollen eyes! due to not enough rest.)

Yesterday was baby's birthday! Me and his friends celebrated for him on 12june2010, one day earlier. Went to play pool, had dinner at hongkong cafe then down to boat quay to drink. Decided to leave that place because its mad boring plus theres police everywhere. We took a cab down to oasis but because most of them underage else never bring IC so cant go in. Sighh :((( Went back to boat quay again. Waste of time seriously.

I wasnt in ANY of the pictures because im that professional photographer that night.
HAHAHA! sit back and relax my work :)))))

And on the exact day of baby's birthday, we went to vivo to have our dinner.

See my baby's drunk face! HAHAHAHAHAS

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2010-06-12T05:59:00.005+02:00

Judge me and i will prove you wrong

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2010-06-11T18:22:00.004+02:00

Btw my boy and i have grown a lot closer recently which is definitely the bright side of everything! :))) HEHEHE

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2010-06-09T19:55:00.002+02:00

I had insomnia last night.. I couldnt sleep. I was really annoyed and ticked off. I couldnt get comfortable. MAD MAD MAD. The future is scaring me. I can only sleep to avoid feeling anxiety and insecurity.

YES! i hate facing the reality.

I really don't want the memory of this day seared by my insecurities.
it was such a beautiful day

---

2010-06-07T16:59:00.003+02:00

Im feeling extremely down
Just feel disappointed with some stuffs.

Things did not turn out the way i want it to be.
I dont want just words. Where is all the actions?

='((

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2010-05-27T14:16:00.002+02:00

NOW THAT I HAVE YOU.

I just hate being alone. Going to sleep alone. Waking up alone. Eating alone. Running alone. Everything is alone.

I dont want to be alone anymore again and i know i wont because i have him :))

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2010-05-25T18:39:00.002+02:00

Mom drived me down to woodlands to get my pay. Hehes. It was drizzling and very windy. Took my pay and left immediately. We went to tampines to have our late lunch together. Roamed around that area after eating and i saw this adorable soft toy and so i got it for my dogs. HAHAHAS. Went home after that :)))))

See! thats the soft toy i got for them. hees. Baby damn biased. Always carry cody then neglect gervain. Poor girll.

My body has already failed me. sickness, weakness, tenderness
Pain. heavy lead legs and a sore head
Weak hands and aching chest
Im not safe. i will die.
SAVE ME!

----

2010-05-25T17:16:00.004+02:00

i need to get a serious grip on reality.

---

2010-05-23T17:26:00.002+02:00

Im feeling pretty bloody good about myself lately. Hehe

I love when baby and i can sit and chat things out. i also love when we have some spare time to ourselves to just hang out with each other without any distractions like the dogs or the tv or other people. Of course, good talking dont complete us just like that. Hehs.

LOVEYOUBABY!

---

2010-05-23T17:12:00.006+02:00

( ME WEARING MY BB's JACKET )

Im not a well bean!!!

Last night when i got into bed i was overcome with a huge wave of nausea. Usually i just go sick it out and be done with it but last night for some reason, i didnt want to. i just wanted to cuddle down and sleep.

During the night i got a really bad headache. i took tablets for it but it still hadnt gone by the morning so i had to take more this morning. Those of you who know me well will know i hate to take pain killers. Well, I had no choice. i felt like ass and i had chores to do so i took them.

Everything was fine with me till just after 5.30. I was really sick at home waiting to go school for my exam. ARGHH.

I'll be better soon I hope.

---

2010-05-22T07:06:00.006+02:00

Baby wasnt feeling well today. Hes feeling feverish and his body aching all over! we went downstairs together with my dogs to visit the nearest clinic. The nurse took his temperature and guess what? Its 40.3! High fever! :((( And i have this irritating flu since i woke up in the morning. I feel like this flu is never going to go away. I feel sicker and sicker as each hour goes by.

While waiting for baby's turn. I snapped pictures of my dogs. tehehehes.

Lying on bed for hours! No amount of blankets and hot tea are warming me up. I kept sneezing non stop like a pathetic loser. Seriously, i dont mind having fever though but not FLU.

---

2010-05-21T12:58:00.002+02:00

There are these pesky things in both of our lives that keep us going. Yours are a lil bigger than mine, but we dont see any of them often. Even when they feel real, they are so worth taking steps for, even if they are baby steps and even if it feels hopeless. Its never hopeless if u keep moving. My reasons to keep moving aint with me yet but i taje a step a day to get to the point that they are and every step makes me closer. It will be the same for you. One step at a time. Baby, they are so worth it. I promise no matter what happens, i will always be around. i'll move every steps with you. I LOVE YOU.

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2010-05-21T12:38:00.004+02:00

19 MAY 2010, WEDNESDAY
I dyed my hair at home together with baby but its not very obvious

20 MAY 2010, THURSDAY
and so the next day i went jeanyip to dye again

And now this is my hair colour. NICE?! :)

Im so not used to the colour of my hair and i think i look weird but my boy likes it.

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2010-05-21T11:35:00.003+02:00

17 MAY 2010, SUNDAY.

Had sushi at CS together. I was damn mad at him this evening. I called and asked him if he wanna eat sushi and he agreed. When we reached that place, he told me hes sick of eating japanese food already =_='' What for agree when you dont even feel like eating right?! We talked things out after dinner and he promised me no more next time. HEHE! Got his mom a birthday cake after that :)) Tomorrow was her birthday.

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15 MAY 2010, FRIDAY

Went ikea together with my boy after his work! Saw so many chio items that we wanna get for his new room! So freaking cheap and niceee! Hehehehehs.

Back to his new house after that :)

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10 MAY 2010, MONDAY
\\

Today is a very big day of my life. Im starting work! There is some anxiety. I dont know how my first day of work gonna be. && im tensed like hell.

Well, i reached my workplace early. Had breakfast together with my boy. Im really glad he send me to work and he promised to do so everyday! so sweet of him.

Theres this bitch damn annoying! She stared at all the newcomers and outcasted us. WTF! Like we owe her a living. My job scope was really interesting and im willing to put my heart to learn but because of her, i dont look forward to work tomorrow.

All my friends cheer me up and told me working is supposed to be like this. There will be some people that you dont get along in office. Rosanne darling told me not to let such bitches affect me and pull me down and i seriously think what she said was true and her words really motivate me alot. Thanks.

---
9 MAY 2010, SUNDAY.

Met up with gloria at somerset MRT. We went shopping that day. She did not get anything because she havent got her pay but still shes nice enough to accompany me to get mine :)))) I got many chio items for myself. Maxi dress, bag, earrings etc. Super happyy!!! Teehehehs. && We had our dinner together at koboyashi. Rosanne darling supposed to join us on that day too but she wasnt feeling well :( AWW. So obviously i want her to stay at home and rest because i know how terrible it feels to go out when you're unwell. We can always meet up other days :))))

We took many pictures that day but im very lazy to stitch them up. hehes.

Friends are supposed to be supporting one another through everything. If you treat me as worthless, taking me for granted and not doing anything to help when i need you badly then why do i want you as friend for? Make sense?

I do not need such people in my life.

---

2010-05-11T09:50:00.008+02:00

8 MAY 2010, SATURDAY

Went Lunar and Arena with my baby together with his colleagues. HAHAHS! Though my eyes are dry and painful that night cause of my contact lens but still i enjoyed myself immensely! Danced throughout the whole night with my boy and i totally forgot bout the pain. It was my first time dancing with him and i loved it! Having fun with him as usual. Twehehes. Baby drank quite alot that night and he got tipsy. We cabbed home after that :)))

Look at the necklace im wearing. It was a gift from him. Nice right?!

Oh btw, did i say my job interview was a success?!
Well yes, ive got the job! :D Tehehes.

---

2010-05-06T10:11:00.009+02:00

Yesterday was a breathless and enervating day. Had a job interview at 10am and i woke up at 925am. HOW NICE! I scrambled and get myself done. Decided to cab over because im late! Like duhhh! BUT no cab in sight. Called cab and they assured me the cab will arrive in 10mins. i reached the interview place at 1030am =_=

Lucky im late. I waited for the interviewer for bout 30mins before shes ready to interview me. And she goes '' bla bla bla bla bla '' Hhhmms. My interview went well and TAA DAA! Ive got the job! Happyyyy! :)) I requested for monday to start work cause sat i will be having exams and i wanna study for it. Oh btw, did i say my boyf went the interview with me? YES! he did! he woke up early in the morning just to go interview with me when he could sleep longer because hes off that day. I was so happy that i got the job and even happier that my boy is the first one i shared my happiness with. WEEEEEES!

Went over to CWP to have our lunch next. Uhya, seriously im too lazy to type what happened after that. Too lazy to type and also if it will be a long post. Lets skip till night, shall we? =)

Went to ahlee's birthday chalet. Wish him happy birthday then we helped ourselves with the food. Baby bbq the food for me! hehe. Theres hotdog, chicken wings, prawns, stingray, potatoes, and many more.

He bbq and peel the prawns for me!

I realised my blog post is all filled with pictures of me and my boy.
Shall take solo pictures soon! :)

---

2010-05-03T19:03:00.010+02:00

Mugged the whole afternoon away till its time for me to go school. I was late for school already after done preparing myself. Saw my mom under block and she send me to school. How nice! :)

Ate grandma's homecooked ''Soon kueh'' in the car while mom is driving. Super love my grandma's cooking! To me. its the best in the world already

I did not take any pictures my grandma's ''soon kueh'' but incase you guys dont know what is that so i got this picture from yahoo.

Surprisingly, i reached my school early! We're having presentation today and tomorrow. Lucky mine is tomorrow. Im doing my project with jasper btw. He did most of it cause he had done this project before. Hehehes.

I left my class 1hr before it ends. Roamed around somerset area before i took a train home. Met up with baby after his work at expo and we had supper together!

Had our supper at kim gary's restaurant, tampines 1.
The food is nice and the price is damn reasonable!

After 930pm, its buy 1 free 1. So cheap!
We only spend 20bucks there including the drinks.

This is mine! Cheese and chicken chop baked rice!
Look nice right? taste nice too

&& my boyfriend ordered this. I dont know what is it exactly but theres curry, beef and cheeese. Not bad! but too spicy for me ;((

Bits and pieces of us:

Okays, rest well everybody. GOODNIGHT!

---

2010-05-02T14:32:00.005+02:00

When i say forever i mean it.
I want it to mean something not just a word you say in the spare time.

---

2010-05-01T06:27:00.015+02:00

Went for darling rosanne's birthday celebration at sentosa, festive hotel.
Boyfriend had to work at expo last minute thats why cannot join us for dinner. So sad :((

We get to choose our own appetizer and food :) So nice.

The appetizer, king crab meat salad.

My main dish, Grilled chicken.

Dessert, rice pudding.

Pictures of us:

( LOL! gloria ate too much and now she look like shes pregnant. So cute!)

Jolyn, Me, Gloria

DARLING ROSANNE! You're one of the bestie in my life. So much memories together and i will never forget them. Forever you are in my heart. Happy birthday babe and i've to say, you look awesome tonight! loves~

Baby came over to look for me after that :) He waited patiently for 1hour+ for me without any complain! I was seriously touched. His handphone was low batt just now and we had a hard time contacting each other :( He coudnt find any public phone at habour front MRT so he trained over to the another train station just to find a public phone so he could contact me yet i mistaken him and told him off for not waiting. When i knew the truth, i was so guilty. Sigh.

i really love my silly boy alot.
ALOT ALOT ALOT.

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2010-04-29T15:35:00.014+02:00

I was quite shocked when i came to know that its 29 april already cause i haven complete my assignment yet.
8th may is the date line and i haven even started doing it =_=
Im afraid i will be late for it but im seriously clueless how to start. ARGH.

Why are the days running so fast for?
Its like they are slipping off my hands and i cant do anything but stare helplessly at them.
I hate this feeling.

Its my paternal grandma's birthday today. Celebrated her birthday at my fourth aunty's house. Another family gathering. The food was all prepared by all my aunties and uncles. I was busy helping myself with food that i did not take any picture at all. LOL

Say hi to my younger brother :)

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2010-04-28T17:58:00.004+02:00

New day, new dreams, new life!
All of it MINE and no one can take it away from me.

---

2010-04-28T17:52:00.006+02:00

Ever have those moments where you just dont care anymore? Im there. Right now i am just going through the motions. I've often heard it said 'fake it til you make it' and im seriously in a faking it mode. Im not happy )):

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2010-04-27T17:51:00.027+02:00

Took a bus over to tampines interchange to meet up with my boy.
While waiting for the god damn long bus to come, i chatted with gloria on the phone.

Had Popeyes with him at century square.

Bus-ed over to his place after dinner.
Took this on the bus. Tweehees.

Great boyf, wonderful family and am studying the course i like.
Why do i still feel like im lacking something?

(You made me love you more, silly boy)

Over the past couple of years I feel like i've grown immensely as a person.
And i am very much a believer in starting fresh, and leaving things in the past.
Starting fresh is really good for the soul. hehe.

Anw, im on my way to being physically and financially fit.
Hopefully emotionally and mentally are soon to follow.

---

2010-04-27T07:28:00.008+02:00

YESTERDAY baby came down to my house to pass me eggtarts that he got from xi dian hong kong pastry and my vanilla oreo double pearls. Had our dinner at the coffeeshop across the road near my place. We shared a plate of mee goreng + ice tea cause i wasnt very hungry. He talked to me bout his work stuffs and i shared with him what i learned online. Twehehes.

I simply love you as much as you do.
Shall see you tonight again! <3

---

2010-04-27T07:05:00.002+02:00

Are you not one?

2010-04-25T10:38:00.005+02:00

Every person is capable of letting another down. Its human nature. Its not what a person seemingly did wrong that really matters. its what truly in their hearts that matters most and how flexible you are in trying to understand them. Most people just want to be understood even if they cant understand themselves. I am no different.

2010-04-24T07:13:00.006+02:00

Okay... I've been sitting here wallowing in self-pity because i dont have the body i would like to have. i sit here thinking of all the wonderful ways i could do something about it. Today will be my first real step towards changing that train of thought.

Oh well. I've done it before and i know i can do it again :))) Im posting this here so i can be publicly humiliated if i fail. Everyone gets to throw rotten fruit at me if I give up. teehees. Yups, thats right folks! Now dont everyone go getting in line already! Give me a chance first. lol! ;)

2010-04-22T18:23:00.008+02:00

HAPPY 2 MONTHSARY, MY LOVE! ♥
Thanks for going through all the shits in my life.

2010-04-21T10:55:00.015+02:00

Im sitting here starring at my laptop and my mind is miles away. I should be doing my assignment but ive got no mood. I feel so sleepy. I know if this carry on, im gonna flunk my current module, which means my $500 going fly away.

( This is me in 2008, 2 years ago! )

&& im not going to let it happen!
okays, im going to rest for an hour then do my assignment. YES! thats the way.

2010-04-18T08:04:00.012+02:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!

Thanks mom for giving us love and guidance as we grew up

Younger bro got mom a chocolate ice cream cake! I always love ice cream cake :) Hehe. && did i say the food there was good and cheap? YES! me and baby were late for the dinner so we didnt really get to enjoy the food slowly :( and no pictures of the food were taken. Such a pity. BBBUT nevermind we're going back there to eat again. Just me and him :)

2010-04-18T05:35:00.002+02:00

I create new blog, she also want create new blog!?

I hate copy cat. Hate people who've got no mind of their own.
Seriously, its a shame to copy until like this.

2010-04-17T12:21:00.002+02:00

Rosanne darling and Gloria dearest.
Despite us not meeting up that often due to our boyf, you babes will still be in my heart

♥♥♥
3 hearts beating as one.

2010-04-17T09:53:00.005+02:00

你给我无法想象的快乐。谢谢你